My dreams are expression, they are part of me; yet not. I am sometimes surprised by what I remember, Other times I feel expressive. I need to share. Don't judge...

 2/11/16 I dreamed last night that I was with a friend and my girls. We were walking downtown. Apparently members of The Decemberists lived in a corner building and were out on the street near their tour bus. Lynora was a HUGE fan (??) and wanted to go meet them. Mind you, she is still four in my dream. We say hello and they offer to take us on a tour of the old building they are using as a studio. It starts in the basement (and I have no shoes on). We walk through the dark, dirty, old basement up to the top of the building. It is really cool because you can see the entire city from there. Lynora starts to run around which makes me nervous because there are no barriers to keep her from going off the edge. Guess what she does? Yes, right onto the grass. A member of the band runs over to her and picks her up. She is laughing. I run down, and the other members are playing with her, making silly faces and she is just laughing. I thank them and we leave. As I walk away, I call Chris to tell him we met The Decemberists. That’s it. I wake up.

 7/22/16 We are Mamaw’s house and I hear something in the back room. I ask Mamaw what it is and she tells me not to go back. Of course, after she says that, all I want to do is go back. As I open the door I see an enormous eel/worm thing with a huge round mouth full of spiky teeth. I slam the door and run to Mamaw to find out what it is. She tells me it is a “demon” that has attached itself to Tommy. Once it attaches itself to someone that person will die soon. We go to a game (baseball?) and come back to Mamaw’s. Walking across the porch is this woman with bright red hair and a scarf. It dawns on me that she is the demon. She walks in the house and tosses her scarf onto my aunt. IT has chosen someone else. I am at a college. There is a large grassy area in front. It has just rained and we see these large brown pods start to come up from the ground. A professor at the college has been collecting and breeding the demons and these are the “babies” We start running towards the building because the pods have begun to explode spreading spores everywhere. I run up the steps and notice people coming out of the building carrying food. I realize that they have already been infected and are craving carbs to help grow the demons. Upon entering the building I see people serving and tables full of food. I grab lettuce because there are no carbs and run up the stairs to the balcony. Suddenly people begin vomiting. I push my way through and run down the balcony stairs to the stairs leading outside. I make my way up the stairs careful not to touch anyone vomiting. As I reach the top of the stairs, I look outside and suddenly become very ill. Then I wake up.

 8/13/16 We were in Chattanooga. I had a company car and was driving through downtown, no real direction but finding my way by familiarity. Around a hilly curve I parked my car and walked down the sidewalk meeting friends and Chris as I went. We walked across the bridge and there was a ballgame playing. Apparently it was a big one because the area was packed. We stopped at a pug place. It was the same place we got our pug before. Valerie was the vet. We found a pug, I spoke to the lady in the small office cove area and the girls held the dog. I wanted Chris to see Valerie’s puppy who had grown. She brought him up, and then a patient came with their wolfhound. It was enormous, he gave it a shot, and we went downstairs to pet her puppy again. We walked back across the bridge and back again. We were drawn to this tower. There were spiral stairs leading up. People dressed in white were singing hymns of sorts. As we climbed, it became more and more peaceful. There was a soft cool breeze blowing. At the top, there were people and a lady guru who took my hand. She spoke to me but I don’t think there were words. I turned and she began tattooing my back just below my neck between the shoulder blades. The tattoo was based on the feelings/vision she saw while holding my hand. As she was drawing, I begin opening up mentally and physically. It is an incredible feeling. Once it was done, an older lady came to brand the tattoo onto me. I did not feel pain. I wait on the others. It opens with Chris, me, and the girls in TN. We are headed back home but Chris decides he wants drive through the corn and tobacco fields. We come out to a stop sign and I tell Chris to turn right. This would lead us through the country to get to the interstate. As we drive it becomes more hilly and thicker terrain. I do not recognize where we are. We stop at a country store/gas station/dam station. There is an older woman at a desk in the front. There are people – country looking men – watching us. We are given directions to our road but as we are driving away, we realize it is leading us right back to them; this time on a Cliffside road over the river/dam. We backtrack and ended up back at the store. Once there we were informed that we were trapped and unable to leave. After several failed attempts at escape, we made a plea to the leader who was a carnival master of sorts. We explained the kids were scared and worried about not being able to get back to start school on Monday. He gave us tickets and took us to a hole in the floor. It had satiny fabric with dark olive, red, and gold. It had wide strips of floral then checkered. There was fringe going down the hem of each section. We were to jump through the hole and supposedly end up at our destination. I kept thinking about how our luggage would fit and what if I got stuck and smothered to death. That’s it. I wake up.


 8/18/2016 Last nights dream We were at Grannies and my uncles were there but one was Matthew Bellamy, and the other was Paul Bettany. They had a storage building that was surrounded by a creek. They stored old family things in there and made jarred foods. We would swim through and around the building to look at different things. We were in Italy but it was a family home. Several relatives came to visit but I didn't know any of them. Someone in the family had an infant. He had some sort of power. He could make things happen if someone said or needed it. We traveled around the city. The city was essentially the inside workings of a transformer. Similar to Horton hears a Who. People were walking around saying the creator is returning. Somehow we were against that. I was with an older man and the infant. We came to a hospital/nursing home and found the bed of an old man. The man with me had an oxygen tank that was running low. When he said he needed to refill it, the baby hooked his tank to the machine without even moving. Then we were at the ocean. There was a woman who lived in a nice place overlooking the water. I think her son and another man had killed her husband. They had taken him out into the water on a hospital roller that had a rocket motor on it. Once the roller was completely submerged, it shot him out into the ocean. He was supposed to stay at the bottom where no one would find him but it failed. The son found him and they did it again. My dream ended with a dark picture of a cove. You could see the man's head just above the water. 


8/26/16 We were all at Lori’s house and it was night. Dion had gone into the kitchen to get something and saw someone at the side door. He started yelling for them to get out and we all ran in there. Lori was looking out the window and said “shit”. She was friends with these disabled kids at a home and they had come over for an unannounced visit. I had Hugo there and was afraid he would get out so I told the kids as they came up the steps to please not touch him because he was big dog. I was standing in front the screen door which had holes large enough for fingers. The kids reached down around them and my hands as I tried to cover it and kept sticking their fingers in. Next thing we are at my house and it is still night. I was in the neighbor’s yard and Chris in ours. We were looking for Hugo because he had gotten out of the fence. There were a lot of dogs running around so we couldn’t see which one was Hugo. We were calling for him. Shouting really. Our neighbor Austin, flipped his yard light switch twice and called his dog Belle. I walked back over to our house and told Chris we needed to be quiet because Austin had flipped his light switch twice. (?) Next we are back at Lori’s house and it is daytime. I had my cousin Stephanie’s infant baby. I am not sure if it was a boy or girl but I knew it had been with me all day so I took it to her room to change it. Steph came in and sat down beside the baby. I went to take the diaper off and the baby had yellow poopy all over it and it got on the bed. I asked her if she was going to bathe it and she said no. She laid down beside the baby – in the poopy – and told me that she loves to sleep that way. WTF??


 8/30/16 We are at Mamaw’s. We had been staying for a while and I was trying to pack everything up so we could go back home. In the back bathroom, there was a green lizard. I tried to catch it my its tail to put it back outside but the tip of its tail came off. I tried again and this time the entire top layer of its skin came off. I was afraid I would hurt it so I left it alone. Went to the kitchen and we all had either a beer or wine then walked around outside. We are then at an apartment that overlooks the city. We are wealthy and there is a hot tub just outside on a shared outdoor space. Chris and I go out then two other women join us. They start talking to Chris and ask about joining us/him. I get out and walk back to the apartment. To my surprise, one of the women tells Chris he needs to go after his wife. She tells him again and he follows. We are back in the apartment and our accountant calls, we do not answer because he is in trouble with someone. A few minutes later he knocks at the door. I do not answer but he opens the door and informs us of something. He leaves and we get very angry. We start to throw the nice glasses, breaking dishes, and I pick up something heavy and throw it at the window that overlooks the hot tub. For some reason we don’t care that the window shatters, we know it will all be fixed. I walk outside and we are at some sort of very large amusement park. There is water to my right with shrubbery down the bank. I cannot find one of my children and begin going through the shrubbery. I find them all – I have Grace, Sophie, Hayden, Luke, Lynora, Lily, and Sunny. We walk to the park. I let the big kids go to a store/game room. The younger ones are with me but start running to different area together. As soon as I get to them and gather them they run again. I follow them to this gigantic white area. It is essentially a very bouncy mattress area for children. There is a dugout type building on the bank of the mattress so the children can me watched – kind of like a lifeguard station. I walk towards the children on the sidewalk for parents, they run past me towards a Walking Dead attraction. It is fenced in and the characters run towards you as you approach. The children are not afraid. To the right there is another similar attraction but it is a Walking Dead Hello Kitty area. It looks like a three story foam building from Monster High but with Hello Kitty images. The characters walk through the foam towards the people who approach, almost as if it is a gel. Fucking weird. I then make my way to a pink bridge that spans from one end of the park to another over water. It has pink flowers on the handrail. The little ones run forward and I am afraid they will fall in the water. The big ones call the taxi that takes you back and forth but its on the other side. I call the little ones back to me so they will not be run over. Instead of waiting on the taxi, they run towards a darker part of a building. It is open to the outside but feels like a parking garage. As I am trying to gather everyone, the dads show up drunk but they help me get them all together. We walk down these steps thinking it is the way back to the apartment but we end up underneath the “parking garage” in an area full of tires. We are directed back upstairs towards a different stairwell. We get back to the apartment which is now clean and repaired because we are rich and people do those things for us. We shower, change clothes, and all sit down to watch movies.

 Years ago: Chris and I took Pug and Boo on leashes to this office “party”. We walked around and talked to a few people. It became clear that they were trying to get us to join them. All we had to do was eat or drink something there. I realized this and ran to find Chris. He had lost Boo and was looking for him. He quickly found him and we ran out of the building to the truck. Just as we jumped in and locked the doors, they surrounded us. We drove away quickly. Once we felt safe we saw a convenience store up on the hill. We drive up and park facing away from the store and overlooking the city. We walk in and were looking around. As I notice others I realize they are the very same people who were in the office. Chris and I understand that we have no choice but to join them. We each purchase a drink. As we walk out of the building and to the car we look out over the city. It has all turned a dark gray/black color and dusted in gold. We get in the car and I wake up.

 A few weeks after mom died I dreamed she came to me at my home, woke me up, and hugged me. I felt her arms around me and she was warm. She smiled and told me she was okay. I was so grateful.

 When I was younger (12-13?) I had a dream that Christ had returned and everyone had to go through the trials and tribulations that he had. If we succeeded we could go to Heaven. My family and I were all at Mamaw’s house. Everyone was a little nervous and afraid. Somehow, it came to be that I had to go first. I was so scared. I opened up Mamaw’s front door and stepped out. I woke up.


 Around 5th grade or so, I had this extreme fear that my mom would die. It terrified me so much that I quit playing with my friends and rarely left the house. Mom tried to tame my fear but I just couldn’t shake it. One night I had a dream – I was in the back bedroom of Mamaw’s house. An angel with long flowing blonde hair and white dress floated down from the sky. She held a scroll in her hands. As she unrolled she told me that everything was going to be okay. I would be okay. She smiled and it was light and warm. She floated out of sight. After that, my fear was eased and resumed being a kid.